Sunday, August 22, 2010

Idiot Clients

Clients,

First, let me explain something to you.  You cannot pay us in kangaroos.  You cannot pay us in rice.  You cannot pay us in worthless stock, or worthless stock options.  You cannot pay us in pandas.  Or wallabies.  Or moose.  Or snow.  Or oil.  You can only pay us in cold, hard, american dollars.

Second, if you come to us asking for something as a client, be it an engineering design, production and implementation of that design, or assistance with the US regulatory regime for your chosen industry, we will do our very best to assist you.  We expect to be adequately compensated for that effort.  However, while we are experts in our field, we cannot express an opinion on the seven other fields for which you need assistance, and for which we are not qualified to express an opinion.  To do so would be not only misleading and lead to a poor outcome for you, but it is also malpractice for us.  It does not matter how many times you ask us an accounting question, or how many ways you ask the same question - we cannot answer it.  We are not accountants.  We are not doctors.  We are not stock brokers.  Because we are unable to answer these questions, that does not make us "unqualified" and does not relieve you of your obligation to pay us for the effort we've expended on your behalf, answering all the questions we are in fact qualified to answer and which we have dutifully fulfilled our obligation to answer.

Third, if you're in over your head, we will tell you you are in over your head.  Just because you received  advice from someone else prior to our involvement who may have sent you down the "wrong path" does not obviate the fact that we've done the work which you've asked us to do, and we expect to be compensated as such.

/end rant


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